Ask Liz 10 days ago by Liz Adams

Coffee with Liz • September 23, 2022

Can you talk more about how marriage counseling is going? Do you mind sharing the books your therapist recommended?

It’s going well! We have had a few sessions and we are taking a two week break to unpack everything we discussed/learned. Our therapist actually said she doesn’t think we need much help, but maybe a little reset? We did a lot of amazing exercises to sort of remind us why we are in our marriage, why we chose each other, what we both look for/need from each other and so on. It has been a really wonderful reminder of the foundation of our marriage.

The books she recommended are You Can Heal Your Life, Too Perfect: When Being in Control Gets Out of Control and Feeling Good: The New Mood Therapy. Right now I’m reading Too Perfect and let’s just say WOW. It’s eye opening and very much me.

What are your most used kitchen appliances? Air fryer, saucepan, etc?

Air fryer, nonstick skillet, toaster oven, food processor and coffee maker!

What’s the most impactful anti-aging treatment or product you’ve tried?

A couple holy grail products are Skinceuticals Resveratrol B E, I use this a few times a night before I put on retinol. This is the retinol I’ve been loving lately! I also LOVE Vintner’s Daughter Active Botanical Serum – I feel like this stuff makes my skin look like a baby. Ha. It’s so pure and wonderful. I am currently out of this but I need to buy again. It’s SO GOOD.

Do you use your Air Wrap on dry hair?

So i’m still learning! Short answer – yes, but I’ve learned that it holds better if you curl your hair when it is 80% wet. Like let it fully dry with the curling attachment!

Random, but do you eat meals outside? Or is it too humid in Charleston?

Yes we do! But if it is too hot we prefer the AC 🙂

Wondering if you could link a few dress options that can double for an October fundraiser (in NC) for my kids’ school and an October wedding (in OH). Neither event is black tie. Bonus points if I can also wear it for family pictures at a Christmas tree farm! Would like to keep the price point under $200-250 since I likely won’t wear this dress much. Thanks!

I love this, this, this and this for fall events! If you want to splurge, this dress is incredible for alllll things holiday coming up!

Help! How do you de-escalate meltdowns with your boys?

We try not to give too much attention to meltdowns. We acknowledge their feelings and sort of let them process them. Given the ages of our kids, these meltdowns usually don’t happen for any big reason. With our kids it works when we don’t dwell on the meltdown, they usually bounce back more quickly! Obviously if it is serious emotions, we sit and talk about it.

How did you adjust your style when pregnant?

I don’t know if I adjusted it too much – lots of jeans, blouses and dresses which is close to my typical style. You get to a point where you feel sort of defeated in dressing and I think I lived in leggings and oversized sweaters at the end. It’s basically survival, haha. Some of my favorite brands to shop from were Hatch, Madewell and H+M.

Any tips for picky eaters? What do you serve when your boys won’t eat anything?

I’ll do a quesadilla (and i’ll chop up some spinach and throw it in there!), pasta with red sauce, grilled cheese and tomato soup, protein waffles with peanut butter on top, yogurt parfaits – to name a few!

If you weren’t doing HAF and Olive Lane, what do you think you’d be doing?

I’ve answered this a few times over the years but I would love to own a little coffee shop/market situation! I am a big morning person and love the idea of starting peoples day on the right foot. I feel like a cup of coffee is such a sacred morning ritual and I love the idea of creating something special to highlight that feeling. I’d also love to sell stationary, fresh flowers and food/table items. Sort of an Olive Lane meets coffee shop!

How do you get back on track with workouts and healthy eating after a slump? I’m struggling!

It’s HARD. I just try my best to not dwell on the slump. I maybe make some small goals and don’t put pressure on myself. I’ll go for a walk, plan some healthy but indulgent meals (like this cheeseburger salad recipe) and start slow. I feel like one healthier day gets me back in the healthy mindset and I let it go from there.

How did you manage mom guilt when Jack or George were newborns? I’m a new mom to #2 and feeling guilty about my firstborn.

I had all of those emotions, too! And in the early days of Jack someone said to me, “Charlie got to be an only child for 2 years, Jack will never get to be an only sibling.” It really gave me perspective on savoring those early days with Jack. A few posts that may be helpful are Why I’m Scared to Have Another Baby (one of my most read on HAF) and Transitioning from One to Two Kids. Hang in there! Mom guilt never really goes away but that just shows how much you love your kids. They feel your love even if you feel the distance, I promise. Plus, a sibling is the greatest gift you could give them!

38-year-old mom going to a Harry Styles concert in Chicago — what should I wear??

I mean if you want to go all out, I think this is SO FUN (also available here). Or this shirt with jean shorts, or something retro like this or this. I’d probably splurge on the first dress if it were me because it would work for holiday fun, new years, etc.

What does retirement look like for influencers?

That’s a great question! Dave has set us up with all the things to ensure that we can retire at some point (like a Roth IRA) – I honestly don’t know much but would you be interested in having him talk about this?

I think when I look at retirement or the “end” of this career, I don’t know what I see. All I know is that right now I have to ride the influencer marketing train while it is rideable. So much changes in the world of social media all the time and as much as it sometimes feels hard to keep up, I have to, you know? Not because I don’t want to (I do!!!), but at some point I’ve become an old dog in these parts and it’s hard to sometimes stay up to date with everything. But I’m trying! So I’ll keep doing what I’m doing until it doesn’t make sense anymore.

Do you mind linking the Golden Goose sneakers that you wear? Thank you!

I love my Midstars but I don’t see the exact color anymore! But I also love these and these.

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  1. Sometimes the universe points you in the direction you need! I had a flashing thought about potentially going to marriage counseling/couple’s therapy recently, and then I saw this post! I am no longer on social media, so I am guessing you posted something about it there and a reader asked you to share more. I too am curious to know more about your process leading up to deciding to go to counseling (of course not asking you to share all the intimate details, but maybe more generalities), and what are some lessons/takeaways you have garnered thus far? Thank you!

  2. I enjoyed this post, Liz! I love the Flamingo pink dress you recommended for a wedding. I actually was just at a wedding a couple of weeks ago and saw a woman wearing a dress almost exactly like this, and it was so beautiful! I am going to take your advice on the question about getting out of health/workout slump. I’m really trying to get back into some sort of healthy routine, so I’ll start with smaller goals and see how it goes. 🙂

    Wishing you a wonderful week!

    Make Life Marvelous