What a year. A year of discomfort. A year of uncertainty. A year of worry and fear. A year of isolation and cancelled plans. A year of staying at home. A year of waiting. A year of slowing down. A year of fewer expectations. A year to take a deep breath. A year to remind yourself what is really important. A year that has opened my eyes. A year of learning. A year that has been truly significant and special.
It’s been a year of testing patience, feeling alone or smushed together (ha), lost routines and constant chaos. It’s been a year that has forced me to change my priorities. A year to let go of expectations for myself and just sometimes get by. Goals were thrown away and new roles were forced upon us. We became teachers and babysitters and personal chefs and master zoomers and professional balancers of EVERYTHING. We learned that there is so much more we can do with less and although this year has been mentally exhausting, it’s also taught me that DAMN, we did it! We are stronger and more capable than we think.
There is so much I want to say about this year. So much that happened behind the scenes that was hard and challenging and things we are still dealing with today. But even more so I want to talk about how 2020 has bettered me. How this year has opened my eyes to SO MUCH and also let me create space and breathe and focus on what’s truly important.
In March I launched our wellness month which is ironic, right? In learning that month and talking to experts I started to realize that my own mental wellness was taking a back seat to everything in my life. So I reluctantly (and I say that in a very honest way) started working with Jackie Loughlin. I started talking and listening to myself, digging deep into past experiences and allowing my feelings to take center stage. Being honest about feelings of resentment and comparison and fears and guilt. I gave myself an outlet and permission to admit my faults. I gave myself space to FEEL which ultimately gave me space to relinquish control, be present, to breathe and live. It’s been a journey that I didn’t know was so essential for my wellbeing.
And then, a baby! Being pregnant this year has been the clearest representation of what this year has meant to me. Family. Watching my kids grow, becoming closer with Dave, focusing on my job as a mom. It’s been the greatest gift that 2020 could give me! Appreciating what is in front of me because honestly, nothing else matters.
At the end of December I always set goals or intentions for the year ahead and this year I have nothing to say for 2021 except…
I hope the year ahead brings you peace. I hope you remember that your life is yours and no one else. Cherish it, nurture it. Don’t let anyone else’s life be a foundation for your own. Compare less. Create the life you want to live. In realizing how grateful I am for what’s in front of me I’ve realized how little I need. You have nothing to prove so do what makes you happy. Go at your own pace. Don’t define anything in your life within the walls of a year. There will be really hard days but there will always be glimmers of hope and light that remind us that we are here for a reason. So take advantage of every reason. Leave the mess, forget about time, let go of whatever you think you should be doing and just go live your life. Enjoy it! Savor it.
Finally, I just want to say thank you. In 2018 my goal was to create a greater sense of community across my platforms and I can’t thank you enough for giving me just that. Your friendship, conversations, support and love for me and my family has given me a purpose that is more than I could have ever imagined. I struggle with finding the words to describe this space sometimes but I hope the same fuzzy feeling that you give me is exactly what you feel when you’re here. A place of honesty and support and zero judgement and real life. A place where you always have a friend. Thank you for letting me be that friend! Thank you for trusting me.
If 2020 has taught me anything it’s that a year is short. So much can change and sometimes we don’t have control over those changes. 2021 is bringing some big changes for the Adams Family and I can’t wait to take you on this adventure!
I love you all! Enjoy your holiday season and the start of 2021! I’m taking some time off (aside from a few more sponsored posts from my valued brand partners to round out the year) to enjoy my family and set the tone for the year ahead. I hope you find some time to do the same. Sending you big hugs and a ginormous wine cheers once this baby is out of my belly! I love you, again. Thank you from the bottom of my heart for a year that I’ll never forget. xoxo
Photos by my sweet friend Charlotte Zacharkiw.