Living over 5 years ago by Liz Adams

5 Tips to Being Happier

5-tips-for-feeling-happierBeing pregnant has opened up a lot of emotions, thoughts and feelings for the future. My transition to a mother, my job, my surroundings, my relationships, my drive, saying yes to things that make me happy, and saying no to things that don’t. In three months I’ll be saying goodbye to a generally selfish lifestyle where Dave and I can do pretty much anything we want without worry, a lifestyle that I am very willing to forego because being a mom is all I’ve ever wanted, but a change to say the least.

I have loved pregnancy. I already anticipate missing my baby’s sweet little kicks and jabs inside my belly – a feeling that is completely unexplainable until you feel it for yourself. It’s such an incredible, life-changing miracle that I am so blessed to experience. However, it has also ignited negative emotions – lack of confidence, insecurity about what our baby will bring for this site/my brand {will you guys be happy? will I have enough time?}, competitive-ness with myself to do more now, regrets, and a feeling that I am constantly one step behind due to a general lack of energy. We all have our moments and instead of getting down I’ve chosen to surround myself with things that will lift me up and taking time to reflect on all of the good {because there is so much}. I imagine that all of us feel this way once in awhile so I thought I’d share five things that have worked for me…

1. Close your eyes and take 10 deep breaths. I probably do this 3 times a day and it’s usually following a moment where I’ve jumped to conclusions about something, compared myself to someone else, procrastinated or made a silly mistake because I wasn’t paying attention. We are all guilty of these moments and sometimes you just have to close your eyes, breathe, move on and ignore that it even happened.

2. Put your phone down. I’ve said this before but comparison is the thief of joy. Whoever coined that phrase was so on-point. If this never happens to you then you are a queen and you need to teach me your ways. No one’s life is as beautiful as it looks on social media, I promise {I can attest!}. So if you’re discouraged because one of your peers, work buddies, friends, etc. are taking lavish vacations, buying an expensive handbag, making more money or just generally better at taking photos than you are – well just know that life is about a much bigger picture. I find that in those moments of weakness where I get down on myself for not doing more, not pushing myself more, not making bigger plans or having bigger goals – I have to think of what I want for me. I promise none of it will matter in 10 years, so put your phone away for 30 minutes and remind yourself that you’re pretty fricking cool, too.

3. Do something that makes you feel good about yourself. Even if it is selfish, just do it. Get your nails done, go for a run, read a book, buy yourself a pretty dress, send yourself flowers, write a thank you note that makes you feel like an adult, buy a journal, treat yourself to an indulgent meal, buy a pretty candle that costs way too much money, or book a day at the spa. If I’m not happy with myself, ain’t no one going to be happy and sometimes indulging in these little things make me happy.

4. Get inspired. For me, this is really useful for when I’m in a rut with work. This is different for everyone but my favorite way to get inspired is to move my office to my favorite coffee shop, browse Pinterest, write down ideas and goals, and create a board that embodies the direction and growth I want to see for my brand. When I feel excited about work it reflects on every other aspect of my life {sad but true}. Are you all on Pinterest? You can follow me here.

5. Step out of your comfort zone. Push your boundaries! There is nothing more liberating that doing something out of character. You know the small tattoo on my wrist? That was a moment where I have never felt more alive in my entire life! Silly but true and although I look down at my wrist and think to myself whyyy? I love it because it defines a moment in my life when I felt brave. Now I’m not saying “go get a tattoo!” but sign up for tennis lessons, go on that first date, apply to the job you’ve wanted forever, move to a new city, pitch yourself to a brand you love, ask your boss for a raise, or kiss the boy first. I promise it will ignite this fire inside you and you’ll look at life in a new light.

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  1. This is so well written! I’m a mom to 19 month old boy/girl twins and I’ve gone through all of the same emotions. I miss going out to dinner, meeting up with friends, and going away whenever we want. Your priorities will shift because you’ll realize things that you used to think we’re so important, don’t matter as much anymore.
    Read the book Lean In. It’s about working women but also gives advice on how to balance your work and home life as a working mom. It’s a great read. Good luck!
    I think you can never stress enough that people shouldn’t compare themselves to pictures of others on social media! Even though the pictures look so perfect, it probably took 50 photos to get the “right” shot.

  2. Such a special post, Liz. What I like most about your blog is that you always speak from the heart! I absolutely love your style posts, but these little inspirational posts in between are so helpful. I can’t wait to see what your blog brings once baby arrives – it will be wonderful!

    http;//www.brightcitybrunette.com

  3. I agree with all those things! I really think that getting inspired and doing something that we love it’s super important on a daily basis! xoxo

    NEW BLOG POST!! Today we talk about ENTERTAINMENT: “HOW TO ORGANIZE A 4TH JULY INSPIRED PARTY” Check out all the tips from food, decor to outfit ideas for this upcomming holiday!!

    http://www.influencerdiaries.com

  4. Have a baby does change everything, but in a good way most of the time. I am more secure, social and a better worker than I ever was before I became a mother.
    Great tips. I definitely think it’s important to unplug for awhile and concentrate on the moment you are in
    Dresses & Denim

  5. Liz, this post is so great! All wonderful ideas for feeling your best – no matter your stage of life. I personally enjoy your blog because it’s relatable, and true to you! How exciting this next stage is – can’t wait to follow along! 🙂

    xo, Laura
    http://brightandbeautifulblog.com

  6. You are very prolific and remember the apple did not fall far from the tree.
    You are a very tasteful, inciteful & beautiful person.
    I so enjoy starting my day with your blog!!!!
    I am following your step #3 and writing my thank you note to you so I feel adult because most of the time I do not act it thank god!!!!

  7. I’ll still be here post-baby. Your honesty is so encouraging 🙂 And as much as I don’t wish these feeling upon anyone, it’s nice to know that we all go through rough patches. I hope your Fourth of July weekend is the best one yet!

    26 and Not Counting

  8. Beautiful post. As a mom of 2, I can relate to worrying about the changes ahead. As far as your blog goes, its unrealistic to yourself and your readers that you would continue to be a 20 some year old forever. The beauty of it all, is that as we age and mature we become more self confident and feel better in our own skin than we did in the younger version of ourselves. Things that used to matter before don’t seem so important anymore, and other things replace those empty holes. Do not worry about this blog we are maturing with you and I am sure there are dozens of women out there right now, reading that are in your same shoes. In all of your posts I always feel weirdly connected, like I am talking to a girlfriend, and aside from your wholesomeness and great style, that is why no matter what life changes you go through, I will continue to be an avid reader.

  9. Love your blog and this post especially! Doing the little things to make yourself feel better are SO very important. Have a great fourth!

  10. Liz, this post is outstanding. I, too, am pregnant and so much of what you offer here resonates with me as my own truth. Thanks for sharing your tips and ideas!

    1. So well written, thank you! I can relate to that list so much, especially points 3 and 5. These things always help me when I’m feeling down, doing something just for myself or something completely new and unknown. Also, you shouldn’t worry about the baby taking away your time, I’m sure it will inspire you even more, which will reflect on your whole life and blog!

      xo Dessie

      http://dgoldenhour.com

  11. What a beautiful post. You have no idea how it made me smile today. I’m going through some very hard stuff and this is just what I needed! Have a great weekend 🙂

  12. This is so inspiring to hear! It’s comforting to know that other people have these sorts of worries. I feel like it can really eat away at you if you feel alone in your insecurities and these tips have really helped me see things in perspective.

    ‘none of it will matter in 10 years’

    I think this is something that I will start using when life (and social media envy) gets me down.

    How exciting that you’re having a baby! Congratulations!! I can’t wait to hear more from you and the direction that you decide to take your brand in. 🙂

    http://www.wisteriainterior.com

  13. Thank you for posting this! I have moments where I need something quick to make me feel happier, usually due to comparisons (go figure). Thank you :).

  14. Love it! Especially the ‘comparison is a thief of joy’ quote. Social media is the culprit of so many young people suffering from low self esteem, so I deffo agree with putting your phone away!

    Good luck with the baby!

    http://www.eatsketchlove.com

  15. Love this and totally right.
    No 1 will increase A LOT! Hahaha breath and also sing – seriously singing helps you calm down and soothes your little one, you can be anything but ok if you’re singing.
    No 2 I’ve taken Facebook off my phone – harsh but true.
    No 3 ESSENTIAL – do this everyday if you can weekly at least – don’t forget who you are.
    No 4 I replaced it with Pinterest and kindle app, beautiful words and pictures – all good when breastfeeding
    No 5 You’ll be a parent – this comes as standard! Best, hardest, most challenging and the most rewarding and wonderful thing I’ve ever done!
    You’re gonna love it!!!
    Carol x

  16. Great article and really wonderful advice. Thank you for your transparency. We all feel, or have felt, these same emotions. It really is helpful to have a couple of go-to “tools” in your back pocket. 😉 My mama always says, and it works every single time, to do something kind for someone else. It never fails to get me out of my head, no matter how low I’m feeling. You are already a great mama, by the way… Happy Fourth of July.

  17. This is the most inspiring post I’ve ever read. Thank you so much for writing it, I promise you I just needed to read something like that. I truly believe life is how we make it and these tips will help me to become happier and enjoy life a little more!
    I adore your blog, thank you again <3

    Big hugs,
    Adeline

  18. How about when your down go do some charity work at a women’s shelter? That will
    Bring it all into perspective and you will feel a lot better than buying an expensive candle. Believe me…helping others is the key…stop thinking about me me me and think of others… That’s pure happiness!

  19. Love this, and really need it today!

    I have a newborn and am just settling into life as you mentioned above-I’m so glad you already realise how much life might change in the coming months for you, it’s an exciting, yet isolating time, and I’m feeling that if I don’t take care of me, I fall into a rut that’s really hard to get out of.

    These tips are great-follow your own advice and you will LOVE the next journey in you life!

  20. Pregnancy always brings out the best emotions.

    #2 is the best on the list. Ever since our little one was born we made a rule of putting our phones down at night. It just helps to keep you present and in the moment.

    Jamie // Hello There, Lady!