It’s been a month since we moved to Charleston! I kind of can’t believe it. It feels like it’s been a month when you look around our house (still so much to unpack) but it also feels like we’ve been here forever. I guess that is probably a good thing!
We are so happy. Dave and I wake up every day and pinch ourselves for the fact that this gets to be our new normal. I don’t think I’ll ever get over seeing palm trees outside our window or the smell of the ocean when you open the door. It’s just been such a welcomed change.
The boys are in heaven. They are outdoors from morning until night if weather allows. I’m pretty sure everyone who walks by knows their name because they start conversations with just about everyone. It has been so nice to spend our mornings at the beach and end our days on the front porch.
On the other hand, I can’t a grip on life. When I think about what our days look like, like if I take a step back and look at our lives as a fly on the wall, holy hell we are a hot mess. Like can’t for the life of me get organized, am constantly pulling out my boob to feed George, Charlie is a maniac and Jack follows whatever Charlie does. Does anyone else feel like all they do is reprimand their kids every 3 minutes? If I have to tell Charlie to “listen!” or “stop whining! you’re 5 years old!” one more time I’m going to pull out my hair. And then they stare at you with this blank stare but also nodding their heads and you know they are saying to themselves “I’m not listening to a word you say.” So I sort of just throw my hands in the air and give up. Someone with older children, please tell me that one day it clicks and they learn that what you’re saying matters? Please. Lie to me. Dave and I are exhausted, ha.
But I’ve learned a lot about myself in this past month. One major thing being that when things feel out of control (ie: no schedule, moving, keeping a new baby alive), I try to control EVERYTHING. And it’s not the good kind of control. It’s the anxious, angry, short tempered, easily irritated kind of control. Which then just makes me feel like a bad mom, wife, business owner, life-liver. The answer for me is to get outside, let go of the control, move my body, meet up with friends and say F it.